I am writing my Keynote speech. I have been writing this speech for years. I found at every turn a road block to prevent me from speaking. Most of these road blocks were out of necessity. I had to finish raising my son. I had to help my elderly father. I had to have a full time job to support myself. The good news is my life has changed and now I feel free to pursue my dream. There are more aspects of my dream than just a speech. Of course the speech is important or I wouldn’t be writing about it and making the finial drafts. I also wanted a blog, a website for the blog, funny cards to sell on the website and much more. Bringing all this together has been a challenge. I feel like my head, inside, is constantly spinning. I am excellent at applying guilt. I lay on heavy guilt when I don’t complete a job quickly and I am the one who makes the schedule. Right now my guilt focuses on taking the speech and making it shine. I want it to be perfect. And, perfection at this point is ridiculous! The only way I can work on the speech is to perform it for an audience. Now is not the best time to be speaking in front of a room of people. I know all this will change but not knowing the date is the toughest part. And, I can’t complain. There are people living on the edge and not knowing if they will have a job when it is time to go back to work. It is my responsibility to make work happen. And, with time and persistence I will be out there too.